Monthly Archives: August 2011

Finding A Spiritual Connection

Finding A Spiritual Connection

(c) www.richard-seaman.comI often imagine myself going on a spiritual journey. Someplace that resembles Southern Mexico, with Aztec ruins and brushland, warm air blowing in the wind, and nothing but my levi’s and a prayer to protect me. Well, as great as that may seem, it is far from practical. I can’t get away as often as I’d like to embark on these pseudo-spiritual endeavors, which seem more like excuses to┬árunaway than anything else. No, for now, I will have to settle for sunny, pleasant Silicon Valley. Not exactly what I’d consider the bastion of enlightenment and transcendental experience. It’s just the area I happen to live in. Oh well. Big whoop. So what’s so frickin’ spiritual about that? It doesn’t have a giant buddha, or an ancient temple, or even one single acropolis (well, maybe there’s one in Saratoga somewhere)… All I see are Chipotle’s and the Egyptian Museum… Hmm…

It is at this point that I begin to see the flaw in my own self-defeating logic. I am trying to find something that is in front of me, and all around me. Talk about not seeing the forest for the trees! I am beginning to see that this spiritual adventure I am seeking is actually playing out right before my eyes. All the challenges and growing/learning experiences are chances to change my existence. I can transform if I allow myself to transform. From this point on, I will make more of an effort to see the opportunities for growth right in front of me, and focus less on how old the surrounding buildings are. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good old edifice. But I can build my own metaphorical ruins, by transformative action. Hollowing out a place for my spirit to grow and expand. It can happen. It will happen. It IS happening. Right now.

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Posted by on August 31, 2011 in Uncategorized, Wellbeing


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Monster from Within


Sometimes it can be difficult to get through the day. Most of the time, life seems alright and nothing more than mild depression or joy seems to take place. But other days, life can seem rough. And what’s more, it may not be clear why. I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning and I am not sure why. I didn’t have sugar before bed or anything, but I woke up terrified. Sometimes it’s the things I can’t articulate that overwhelm me more than anything else. At least with a challenge that’s laid out in front of me, I know what to fight for and what to prepare myself against. But this morning was something different. Sometimes the monster is not like something in a Harry Potter movie, but something inside of me. Another form of destructive beast. The kind that takes on friendly forms and eats me from the inside out. I speak of course about a monster that has no name, one that lies in the deep and waits for a vulnerable time to strike. It cares less about the injury and more about getting me down.

For days like this I have to tell myself to press on. Fight the good fight, or don’t fight at all. Do whatever it takes to not let it take control. I took a hard look at all the wonderful gifts I have in my life and decided to focus on that. And although I felt sad and anxious, I walked through it all accepting the fact that I can be a neurotic young man sometimes. ­čÖé

So having pressed on and weathered the crappy morning of uncertain despair and hidden sadness, through the love and joy of the world around me and the wiliness to not only push through my emotions but also accept that I have them and maybe they will sting for a while. After all I am not a robot. I get knocked down and I get back up. It’s not easy. It just plain isn’t. But it is possible. With faith that everything will be okay, I can walk through anything. So I will choose to hold that in my mind the next time I wake up less than wonderful.


Posted by on August 29, 2011 in Wellbeing


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